I like you, haiku
You're like my best friend
But, actually, not.
Not that you're not cool
It's that you're not a person.
"Best friends" are people.
Well, except for dogs
"Man's best friend" and all of that
Lassie, Rin Tin Tin
My dog's named Audrey
If you were really my friend,
You'd know that by now.
Jerk.